I remember the moment when Bean and I shared the front row of the big tour bus on our way back from visiting a light house. She was enjoying her ride and her bubble gum and I was enjoying watching her enjoy her ride and bubble gum. The light outside of the bus was beautiful and golden and it bounced in and out of our seats as we twisted and turned down the hillside.
I remember the overwhelming feeling of soaking up the goodness of the moment, not just of the time that we were sharing but of the goodness of the light and the artful moment that was playing out before me. I sat my camera on my lap and silently aimed up at her and clicked away "framing" the scene with a blind but hopeful eye.
Looking at these pictures speaks an affirmation to my heart that I would rather capture a million of these oddly imperfect yet perfect shots instead of the perfectly created, and often contrived, ones. Do not get me wrong, the created artful photos are beautiful and fun but they do not inspire or excite my desire to pick up my camera. This is proof of the fact that everyone is wired differently to create. I have photographer friends that are amazing at creating artful moments and scenes with passion and zeal. I watch them with awe and admiration, yet find no real desire to be like them. (Crazy, but I used to feel odd about this.)
Instead, I am thrilled when I stumble upon artful moments and would rather choose to seek after and capture them, rather than create them. To me, those moments and the photos that hold them, speak loudly to the part of me that has always sought after authenticity and realness not only in my photographic journey but in my life's journey as well.
In the art world this falls under the category of finding your own voice. That journey is a long one as it takes some serious listening and struggling and departing from the easy route of imitating, which we all fall prey to when we are first exercising our creative muscles. But, from my experience, it is a struggle worth having.
As I looked at these snapshots of Bean on the bus I was reminded of all of this. Reminded of who I have discovered myself to be as a photographer and why I don't really want to be anything else.
2 comments:
I love love love these photos, Tracey. Some of my favorites of Bean to date. Or favorites of yours, period.
Love your words, too. Being real and authentic is something I strive for. It's something you are succeeding at, friend. That's just one thing I love about you.
Have a wonderful weekend. (And I love that sweater that Bean is wearing. I would love one in my size! And her hair is getting so long!!)
oh, yes... the lighting outside is so wonderful!!
what beautiful shots. the last one with that awesome laughing smile across her face is the best one! they are perfect to me... and not even in an oddly imperfect way. but i know what you are saying.
your thoughts remind me of a quote by ansel adams that i love and have on my blog... "you don't take a photograph. you make it."
but he was a "set your camera up perfectly and take a beautiful scenery shot of things that are always there" kind of photographer... not a "spur of the moment, life's little moments" kind of photographer. so in his case, his quote makes sense.
in the sense you are talking about, you definitely have to seek out and capture rather than create... especially as a mom, i would imagine.
and you do it so artfully. perfect.
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