I know Michaela. It's totally horrific to watch and I feel your pain. When Daddy cleans out his car it makes me sick to my stomach too. Once it's complete though you'll move on...until months later it happens again. That disbelief you felt today will come back to you all over again and you'll shake your head, offer a tsk tsk, but it won't make a difference because he will never reform. He is part of that half of the male species that just cannot keep his car clean.
Let us take note of what your dad removed today:
Two breakfast-caked bowls. (note: our nice bowls)
Three of our best spoons. (If you wonder why we never have enough spoons, now you know.)
One precious coffee mug. (A Christmas prezzie from you Micheala!)
Your bathing suit. (Next time you are looking for it, check your dad's car first.)
A cool snack bag (thanks Jodi) that probably contains stale crackers and a hot cheese stick.
And what the *@#!??!!! A half eaten piece of chocolate cake?! (There. Are. No. Words.)
A thrashed paperback Bible. (I'm not sure which is more sacrilege: a tossed Bible or a half eaten piece of chocolate cake left in a car?)
A little bag of Jelly Beans (Which I know you want but I need to inspect them first.)
Two books, titles unknown, but two of hundreds he owns. (I hope you like to read as much as Daddy.)
Melted Balance Bar. (Why, I ask, do I spend 99cents on those things if they just melt in the car?)
One of two of his phones. (No comment.)
Ha! And another uneaten piece of pastry goodness from the coffee shop! (Ditto on the chocolate cake comment.)
Truthfully Michaela, today was not that bad. There was no mold, unreturned DVD's, or lost underwear, dirty socks, etc. Pretty tame if I must confess. Nevertheless, next time you are cruising around town with Dad, squished between stacks of cd's, books, breakfast bowls, empty water bottles, football cleats, and spoons, please take a moment to talk to your father about the health and safety hazards he is subjecting you to. Tell him you don't want the ambulance drivers to find you at the scene of an accident, knocked out from a flying bowl, or impaled by a spoon, or sick from inhaling mold spores. And maybe we just need to start praying that you marry from the other half of male species that likes a clean and tidy car?
2 comments:
I had no idea this was an actual genetic impairement. Thank you for helping me understand this. Thank you also for making Tim's car look a wee bit better than I originally thought. :)
I am cracking up. And I am going to make Tony read this.
:)Wendy
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