Other days my fears are untethered, no longer weighted down by rational gravity.
There is so much going on in this world lately that I find myself painfully, curiously watching with my hands up to my eyes, nervously peeking through my fingers. I try not to live in denial, but sometimes I just have to turn off the radio, the computer, get off Facebook, because I just cannot emotionally filter the barrage of information and photos: earthquakes, predictions of more earthquakes, tsunamis, nuclear meltdowns, radiation exposure, political unrest, economic collapses.
I guess my sensitivity to all of this should drive me to pray, but sometimes I just wanna be a mom trying to decide what special elective my son should take for his jr. high class schedule next year. (If we are all still alive by then.)
Some fear is rational. Like fleeing from a tsunami constitutes rational fear.
Fretting over events, and prediction of events (like the earthquake that is "supposed" to hit California today) that are out of my control is fear untamed. Right?
Anyway, this is where I have been this week emotionally. The picture of Bean has nothing to do with this all. It just happens to be my favorite image that I captured this week, and one that brings me to a better place when I look at it.
I know where my personal peace comes from. It's just that some days I am desperately clinging to it.
4 comments:
Oh, Tracey...this is about how I've been feeling as well. I go to bed thinking about all that is going wrong in the world, and all that could go wrong and feel consumed with fear and wondering what in the world to do. I have to not let myself think about it, or it's all just a bit too frightening and will have me panicked and teary-eyed in minutes.
Sometimes it is easier to just be mom, and focus on my little world - my husband, son and dog. I feel like I can do something with the people in my own little corner of the world.
Keep holding on to that peace. It will get you through. :-)
Loved this post. I think its so important to try and live in the now, but it's hard when everything starts going like it has been lately.
Beautiful post though, and congrats on getting a place at IheartFaces.
Hope your weekend is wonderful,
K xx
These last couple of days and weeks have been fear inducing for certain. I am glad you have the peace of Jesus. I can't imagine what it would be like without that sort of peace.
Congratulations on being a winner at I heart faces last week. I knew your picture was amazing the moment I first saw it. I am so happy for you!
Tracy, I think this goes through everyone's minds. I also watch the news, radiation in Japan, check the weekly earthquakes we have where we live on the Berkeley website, and things happening in Capitola from the tseunomis. When you have children or not, it affects you in such a different way, a basic real connection for others. Our compassion for people all over the world is always there. I do things like donate to the Red Cross, watch the news no more than an hour a day, and keep my home prepared for an earthquake, water, food, flashlight, etc. Did you know the newest on that? It's no longer under the desks at school. It's next to your bed or a couch at home, as anything falling hits the coffee table, couch, bed, first, and there's a triangular safer area next to those bigger items that take the impact from things falling from ceilings. Things like this make me less fearful.
Tracy, I LOVE your photos! You have captured the beauty in the world with them. Continue on in your journey. Your photos show the joy you have with your children and friends, and gives joy to others. I feel like you, and enjoy every little moment to the fullest.
Toby(Photo Club)
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