iheartfaces: motherhood

Sometimes I think motherhood is just one long practice in the art of holding, and letting go.

At first, we are constantly holding them: on the couch, in the rocker, in our arms trying to make dinner, or standing sleepy eyed in the center of a darkened room in the middle of some crazy early morning hour. We swaddle them close, swaying to the rhythm of some silent song in our heads, waiting for the finale of one last droop and close of the eyelids that marks the sendoff to some far away land of sleep. Later, we are holding them close while reading a bed-time story, administering band-aids, hugs of encouragement, comfort. This is the practice of learning to hold them "just so".

Then they grow before our very eyes and we are frantically trying to stay one step ahead of them. When our worry gets the best of us we find ourselves, minute by minute, praying for their protection, health, safety. Praying that they will make good choices, make good friends, find the perfect love, just make it through each day alive. We can no longer cling to the false safety of choosing for them, being in control of their daily lives. This is the practice of letting go.

And no matter what chapter we are in, we are wondering if we are doing the "right" thing, wondering just how much money our children will have to spend on therapy later on in their adult life. :)

Motherhood is the most difficult job in the world with the least amount of pay back in dollars and cents. Through our best and worst moments, our reward is the change that it brings to our own hearts and lives. For better or worse, we are never the same after that moment we hold our first child.

This week over at iheartfaces they are celebrating motherhood. What an appropriate theme coming off the tail of Mother's Day.

I did not get a chance to do a mother's day post yesterday, to publicly honor my own mother. So let me just say....

Mom, I know you could have written this same post today. I know that you have held, swaddled, swayed, prayed me into the person I am today. I also know that you have prayed yourself through the worry of letting go of what you could not control. I want you to know that you have done an amazing job. Yes, I did spend some money on therapy :), as we all could, but it does not invalidate the amazing love that you have poured into me every single day of my life.

I am so very thankful for your example to me of what it means to be a mother who lovingly holds, and lets go.
I love you.
xoxo
t


p.s. go check out all of the other motherhood posts at iheartfaces.

click here