solitary perch

Friends,

I am saying a short and tiny goodbye today. Gonna wade out to that sunny warm rock and perch myself upon it and take a summer breather from the blogging. I have some other "things" that need my attention: other photo stuff, family activities, and my own personal care.  All good stuff, just listening to the whisper in my ear that is telling me to take a little blog vacation.

I will be back August 1st.

Until then,
t

p.s. One of my favorite things this summer has been to photograph Bean in her pink hat. I bought this pink hat for her several years ago and she has finally "owned" it. Makes me smile. :)

summer love: campfire love

Learning to love my video feature on my camera.  In my other life I am a cinematographer.

I love that you can hear the adults discussing a crossword problem in the background. Whenever we go camping we find ourselves around the campfire with a good crossword.

Bean is obsessed with smores. It is her reason for living when the campfire is lit. I cannot even eat my dinner in peace because of her impatience.

I also feel the need to clarify that the sassy girl she is channeling is not her norm. She only surfaces whenever the camera is in her face. Well, maybe she comes out more often. Lord help me. If you listen carefully you can hear my muffled guffaw.

Anyway...

Summer for us = one good camping trip complete with smores and crosswords.  (Even if Queen Sass emerges around the campfire.)

a little affirmation

Excavate the depths of my photo files and you will find that most of them are of children.

I love children.

I love to capture their littleness.

I love to capture them unaware, just inhabiting their space.

I love to capture their profiles.

I love to capture their goofy sides.

I love to capture my reflection in their eyes.

I love to capture the proof of their infinite beauty and uniqueness.

So is it any wonder that I am forever trying to throw my photographic arms around them?

This past week my Picture Inspiration assignment was to do a little excavation, to look back at my assignments and show you all what I have discovered about myself through my images.

This assignment was more of an affirmation than a discovery. (Is this really a surprise?)

So today I am showing you what continues to be an affirming, resounding, "yes" in my creative heart: given the choice between a flower, a landscape, a family, a wedding, a baby, or a child, my photographic heart will always draw nearest to the face of a child.

I am a magnet, drawn by the force of their innocence, and charm, uniqueness, and wonder in an unquenchable thirst to capture their worth.

(This is my "niece". She is a ham. A close second to my Bean who is her competitor. She was insistent on me photographing her "O" mouth. So I made sure to get that for her.)

still not yet...

After yesterday's post I stumbled across these two photographs...photos that were taken by my mother when we went down to Santa Barbara for a little girls trip a couple of weeks ago.

I am so glad I shoved the camera into my mom's hands and told her, with much encouragement, that yes she could take a good picture. There was a brief moment that my belief in her wavered when I had to show her a couple of times where the shutter release button was located, and she fumbled to hold the heavy camera. But she did it. She actually did it.

And so as I reflect back upon the post like yesterday's, in which I reveal the slightly elevating panic I am feeling over the growth and loss of my little Bean, I see these pictures...

...and I cry.

...and I melt.

Now I know what it means when others say to their children, you will always be my little girl.


She will forever be my Bean. I know I will always see traces of her underneath her skin, in her eyes, and in the way she loves me.

I cannot thank my mother enough for taking these pictures.

not yet...

Someday she will be too old to play at the park.
But that someday is not quite yet.
I know it's soon, because there is another person emerging from the skin of her little girlness.
This new girl is a bit more opinionated, more--shall we say--sassy, more self conscious.
I need a manual.
I need an orientation week like they have at school.
I need a laser gun that will freeze time.
I need to breathe in, breathe out.

I am not ready for this.
How do you let go of your little girl?

friday summer love: summer camp's smelly success

We picked him up on Sunday after a week away from us at summer camp.
He and his buddy didn't shower, brush teeth, change underwear.
He had a blast.
You cannot imagine what it was like for me to open his duffle bag in the laundry room
and be greeted with the smell.
I actually chuckled.
Apparently he wasn't trying to impress any of the girls.

linked: hope

Saturday evening I sat out in the setting sun and picked at a sea of never ending weeds. My hands were caked with dirt and the stain of green, so much so that I was surprised at how sore and tender they were the day after. In the middle of my dirty work, the neighbor's sprinklers spurted to life. Because I live in a wind tunnel, I watched the water catch wind and mist everything in my yard. Normally I do not mind this (free water) but this time it happened to water exactly where I needed to be weeding. 

So I sat and waited.

When the sprinklers finished their cycle, I looked up to witness every flower, blade, and leaf dusted with a million, glittering, circles of light. Their delicate glimmering caused me to smile. I imagined this is what pixie dust must look like...

Pulling weeds has always been a teacher for me in the area of my own personal "weed pulling". For example, pulling weeds has taught me that if I fail to pull a personal weed up by its roots, it will always grow back in the soil of my heart. (Such a hard truth, especially in the areas of hurt, anger, and bitterness.)

So here is what impressed me on this day:

As I look back at the moment, I now see that that this is what Hope looks like when I find myself in the dirty work of pulling my life's weeds. There I am, entrenched in the soil, bent over, hot from the sun,  caked with mud, wondering (and whining) if there will ever come a day when I do not have to pull weeds. (Please, don't you just wish you could pull a weed once and then never have to come back again?) In the middle of my labor and toil, suddenly Hope arrives in the form of a million points of Light. Awash with beauty, completely unexpected. It comes in the form of an answered prayer, a encouragement from a friend, a song on the radio, a miraculous provision. All simple reminders from God that I am loved, watched over, and never abandoned to the eternal dirty work of pulling weeds. This is Hope that sustains me.

I believe there is no place of dirt and darkness that Hope cannot invade. No weed-like burden that Hope cannot relieve. Yes, there is an amount of toil that we experience in this life, the pulling of weeds, or the dirtying of our hands in the messes that seem to show up like weeds. But Hope is the eternal flame that God places in our hearts to whisper to us that, though we may have earthly pain and struggles, unanswered questions, our lives are not without purpose and meaning.

We are loved.

We are loved.

We are loved.

Praying that whatever back-breaking, weed-pulling situation you find yourself in, you will, today, experience Hope in the middle of it. That you will look up and see a million points of Light dusting your situation with the promise that you are loved, watched over, and never abandoned to the eternal dirty work of pulling weeds. Praying that this will sustain you as only real Hope can.

******

Today is a link up day with two of my blogging friends, Michelle and Stacey. Michelle chose the theme for this week, which was "Hope". I have to say, this was hard. I took these pictures above without the intention of capturing "hope". It wasn't until I uploaded that they spoke to my work of "pulling weeds". I "hope" it makes sense to y'all. :)

I am eager to see how the gals interpreted this theme this week!

For Michelle's July 7th post, click here.

For Stacey's July 7th post, click here.

sparkler magic

Every kid should hold a sparkler at least once in his life....

Yesterday on the 4th we were gone from morning 'till night hanging with good friends and eating our way through the day. The weather was beautiful, perfect for a water balloon fight and hanging out on the front lawn. We ended the day with some sparklers that I had purchased at an out-of-town firework stand.

Street works are completely illegal in our part of the state so it makes me sad that my kids have not been raised to experience the once-a-year agonizing wait for the fall of darkness on the 4th, when their father and uncle would drag out the boxes of fireworks to set off in the street. (I always felt that the sun set slower than usual on Independence Day. Anybody else feel that way?)

I am having to create a new kind of 4th memory, so yes, I broke the law, and splurged for some sparklers. I feel quite confident in posting these pictures even though my brother works for the state law enforcement. It's not that he wouldn't turn me in because I am his sister, it's because--ahem, cough cough--he knows what he was doing in his front yard at the same exact time we were lighting our sparklers. If you get my drift? Ok, that's all I am going to say about that.

So anyway, back to the sparklers...

Honestly, night photography is an art form at which I am not very skilled. But my Picture Inspiration assignment this week was to "dig in" and explore another art form, have some fun, get a little messy. I think I was a little broad with my interpretation of this assignment but I went with it. I have always wanted to try some night photography so I decided to make this my "dig in" moment. I discovered how fun it was to play with the settings to see what I could create. It was also fun to watch the kids "dig in" and explore what they could do with their sparklers. They wrote their names in the air, twirled and danced. Here's Bean writing her name on the street...

I learned a little bit in the process of having fun. I learned how to work with my shutter speed, and follow the light and work in darkness, which is tricky. It was a successful "dig in" moment for me.

And a super fun way to end Independence Day.

A happy belated 4th to you all. Hope it was a fun one.
t

friday summer love: visiting old friends

This past week we visited old friends.
She walked amongst them, giving each a name, greeting them with a pat-pat.
I do believe this is becoming her favorite summer destination.
Mine too.


p.s. I can' believe how much she has grown in the last year.
Next year she'll be as tall as her friends!